i feel guilty for kissing another guy

If I some how knew which thread to follow to I'd go. I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 6 months and I feel so guilty. My girlfriend(Cintia), me and my best friends girlfriend (called Mercy). Own your truth- You did not expect to hear the REAL TRUTH and the RIGHT ADVICE. I tried to flag down a taxi but it ignored me and I even hid behind a wall at a garage while he took a pee. It's South of France for us this year, holiday-wise, and then in about a year-and-a-half's time we're off permanently to Espana (por favor). Yes, I think if your boyfriend thinks his girl or boy or whatever is gonna be loyal to them even under the influence. Add your answer to this question! I like the soft smooth touch of a woman and her sexy smell while iam kissing her with passion, if there is a romantic connection it's even better. Wife of 8 years straddled and flirted with my friend last night while drunk My Girlfriend Kissed Another Guy whilst Black-Out Drunk. Thinking of it over and over again will affect you mentally, and make it worse. I appreciate you taking the time to reply to me, I can see you feel very passionate about infidelity, however, on this occassion I won't be taking your advice. In fact, you dont even have to tell your partner what you did because it was an innocent kiss. It was such a weird experience. Still, now that the courts are coming down wider and heavier on emotional abuse, I'm sure it's just a matter of time. What? lover. Lees theory has a big vulnerability. Sorry, you two, I'm not ignoring you, just super-super-busy at the mo. You just never, ever know. I know true remorse when I see it. After all she did say that the kiss lasted for maybe 5 minutes. One way to alleviate guilt is by taking action. Thankfully, he immediately and apologetically backed right off (which was when we woke this other woman and they both left), and, luckily, put his apologetic money where his mouth was by phoning me the very next day to say how stupid and guilt-wracked he felt, assuring me it would NEVER happen again so could I please forgive him and just forget it ever happened. But I don't see the need to borrow trouble by telling your boyfriend if you have learned your lesson and know you will never do . A relationship with a man is supposed to be specifically platonic, says YouTuber David Godinez, while filmmaker James Rath says that men are told not to be physically intimate. WORK. I have never done anything like this before and truly would never again. Jam, your wife holds the cards. Mr S lived there once (San Fransisco), but he hasn't any urge to return, either. Ill bet you got drunk on purpose because you wanted to kiss him/her.. Im also pleased that you agreed with my argument as to when to fess up and when to keep your mouth shut. What!! Loyal Girl sorry to hear about your situation. Something like that changes almost everything in a marriage. My wife left me because I had become emotionally unavailable. reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2005): Already have an account? Your boyfriend may love you so much that he believes you won't repeat the cheating ever again. I could go on about a lot of things here. female When I was in college, I cheated on a bf while I was drunk not because I was drunk, but because I was presented with the opportunity and I wanted wanted to do it. 3. Yup. Take it away, expand if you please! So it looks as if we're suddenly at crossed-purposes, then. The last person you should be talking to about your feelings of guilt is your partner. Again I could go on with this subject,and I undoubtedly will. You already have internalized that part. All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft, Register in under one minute and get your own agony aunt column. This post is probably the most intelligent and insightful posts Ive seen on this site. Now that you got drunk, you feel justified in kissing that person because you got drunk and couldnt help yourself. My opinion, fwiw, is that what you did was not that bad. It's wonderful that you even wanted to kiss someone! He's seemingly petrified I'm going to throw him out, he's cried three times today already and they're only the second time I've ever seen him cry in four years. LOL Not work you put off until 'tomorrow' - TODAY. I spent the next day in bed all day crying and it has to be one of the saddest days of my life. I'm so confused. Confide in someone you trust. Dont tell me that you and ______ (the girl who was staying at our house for the weekend) are lesbians? For me infidelity is a deal breaker I don't care what the circumstances were. Not just what I did but the fact I work with this person and have to continue to work with him. See what she has to say. Y'know what it all boils down to the lips. If you kissed a stranger, your significant other might just react by laughing or by telling you it's okay. So if your planting includes a blight (guilty secret), please don't moan if it affects the crop yield. He also sent me a mean text that said for me to go f myself and to stay away from him. I see this as two issues. I regret waiting so long to tell him.-2 months. If you we're my girlfriend and it was years ago and never happened again I would not want to know. They say don't tell the wife or husband about the infidelity, because it would cause more hurt. I dont want him to be thinking that I am a cheat. 5. Yes, that's what I was going to advise - that you two continue any discussion on LG's own thread. For starters, you've no way of knowing whether this other woman *was* genuinely asleep or whether she might gossip to someone who goes and gossips to someone else, etc.. Plus, you don't know what this bloke might choose to do or whom he might blurt it out to the next time he gets drunk (back and forth male posturing on a lads' night out, for example)! Either way, I've noted your comments, I've already decided what I am going to do, and I'll deal with the consequences, whatever they might be. I was enjoying myself and loving the chats and laughs. And the tricky piece de resistance You might feel guilty about it the next day, but it wasnt a big deal. Psychology Today 2023 Sussex Publishers, LLC, Psychology and the Mystery of the "Poisoned" Schoolgirls. Therefore, you might be surprised to learn the following facts about guilt: What can you do to address unresolved guilt? Stories about open relationships, swinging, polyamory and other alternative relationship structures. Years after my divorce the one thing that still makes me really angry is that my XH should have ended the marriage as thats what he wanted. "then the cheeky ugger only went and bloody kissed me, didn't he! New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. It happens, in other words. I kissed another man four years ago. I said no but he assured me nothing would happen and we would just lie and cuddle.In a drunken moment I agreed and he assured me nothing would happen. Myself and the man were sitting next to each other on the couch, and the other woman was sitting on another couch at the other side of the room. I work in hospitality, so I can't change departments, but I can change my shift pattern. Then I ordered taxis, woke up the other girl and we left. Reviewed by Gary Drevitch. Please leave me a comment. Funny, I have never gotten amorous when I have had too much to drink. I recall an incident years ago, we were very young, just teenagers, and a girl planted a big kiss on my hubby (then boyfriend) on a night out. I wonder how that struggle with trust might affect bonding within a romantic relationship contex- oh, wait - could it, would it, on a train in the rain with a fox in a box, Sam-I-Am, possibly always communicate to your husband a sense that you don't fully enough trust *him*, in which case that must mean you're judging him by YOUR standards ergo he'd better hold back a bit just in case? Amazing how long this subject has carried on. I think its interesting that you put in the innocent and the guilty kiss. Guilt occurs primarily in interpersonal contexts and is considered a "pro-social" emotion because it helps you maintain good relations with others. A female friend of mine was staying at our house for the weekend. I feel horrible. You mentioned foreplay as being the main gate. However, if you kissed someone whom you liked or had a crush on while you were drunk, my opinion is that you cheated. Not Opening Up To You Anymore My husband went ballistic and said, I just knew something like this was going to happen. But I do have to state it or I'm failing to do this role properly as well as my innate compulsion to be unwaveringly socially and morally responsible - meaning, if you don't want to respond, don't. Spoiler alert: Not that different from kissing a girl, only they dont fancy them. he set the standard of how he wished this relationship to be conducted in such scenarios yet you failed to follow it WHY did you?). I'll inform the vicar, you cancel the cake, yeh? And as for our original subject, who knows maybe she told him. What did she say? Don't have an account? You came to your sences and stopped this from going any farther. , By entering this site you declare I'm not sure if you are trying to be helpful, or just entertaining yourself with your responses. He is a good person and a good husband and I love him very much. Finding it with someone else just accelerates the process. :), Ah cawlled *you* 'sistah', dun't mean Ah iz wurn too, 'kayyy, shugah? What are you going to do, then? I worry I made huge mistakes in my life and that I am destined to life a "good" family life forever more, but never feel that amazing desire and lust and sexual attraction I don't feel for anyone else but this man. So she told him for starters to kiss her well you know where. Simone was telling a caller how satisfy his girlfriend. Wow! As for what we believe about kissing being the gateway to sex (specifically foreplay, which itself is the main gate): if anyone believes it *isn't*, thenwellAll I could say to that is: Will the guilt ever go away? And has also started crying for no reason when things are going well between us. Similarly, meeting with someone privately and not telling your partner can also be a warning sign that . Just, why leave yourself open if you don't have to. I cannot tell you how much I love my boyfriend and how shocked I am about this. v5.00a - 0.32607s [RUM] 2023-03-03 02:57:10. But not good enough and you not happy enough to exclude fore-foreplay (open-mouthed kissing) with someone (*ugh) other than him as per the for-life contract? I agree. Social media, the Internet, texting and so on. 2023 FemaleFirst Ltd. all rights reserved. Don't feel guilty. Lol I love you already. Plus, I *was* moreover affronted, meaning the guy got off lightly, because [1] I hadn't even caught his eye, [2] my wedding band is very thick thus too noticeable even from a distance, meaning his chat-up attempt was both un-instigated and unwanted, so [3] what sort of person did he think I WAS, just from looking at me?! I went to a party with friends last night and I kissed someone.. You wanna tell your husband? Nah Don't say a word about it. Once my tennis coach misread me, came into my house, and gave a peck on my cheeks, in India, kissing is not a social gesture. What if she sabotages the relationship through guilt? 2. Almost a year ago I began university, my boyfriend and I decided we would do long distance and we are still together now. Again - your choice. I feel like I am hypnotized by the guy. The doubt in your mind over his behaviour might actually be a doubt in your mind over yours. Alcohol was a factor, but all it did was bring to the surface the feelings that were already there. Because your significant other doesnt fully believe that you just kissed this person because you were intoxicated. My husband always encouraged me to pursue music, and, when I told him that this guy wanted to give me advanced piano lessons, my husband was in favor of this. Houston? I mean if a person can't rely on their own strength of character and self-discipline to stop them from crossing that line, they obviously NEED an outside deterrent. In a way you are trading his peace of mind for yours, do you really think that you will accomplish anything by doing that? I put a blanket over her and sat back down next to the man. If you kissed someone while you were drunk then perhaps you are worried about doing it again. I get the whole 'not wanting to hurt him' thing but, to some people at least, a kiss is very much cheating and so the SO deserves to know what happened right? [3] you couldn't extend to him the same courtesy he'd already extended to *you* (i.e. Is kissing someone else when drunk cheating? I was correct, she struggles with trust. It's mos becoming serious and we really like each other! The playing field is even now according to statistics. I kissed another man four years ago. He never says this so I knew it was something serious. I've been Dating a married Albanian man for 6 months already and NOT proud of it.Just wanna share my, Hurt my ex girlfriend, feel guilty and don't know what to do. I love your stories, Foxie. (I bet many would not kiss & TELL -as it would only invite chaos in their marraiges). You kissed a guy - Possibly unforgivable. I dont know what else to do. Hubby had a similar experience when we were in our first year - with his ex. I rather throw it all out in the openbe honestapologize for my mistakeand be ready for the consequences. If it in the meantime hits a nerve and makes you uncomfortable or even gets you all het up, that's your problem, not mine. I'm not married nor have I ever been married. Press J to jump to the feed. I think they all count as cheating and I'm not sure it's necessary to make a distinction. What if they were married? And if you're not confessing - to the victim - you're dodging doing time. The 5 Ingredients of an Effective Apology, The Power of a Dream: The Customs Inspector, 3 High-Risk Relationship Concerns No Couple Should Ignore, Eliminating Guilt, Shame, Regret, and Worry, Protecting the Innocent: The Cognitive Context of Guilt, How to Deal with Breakup Guilt in a Healthy Way. Oh yes he has cried a help of a lot. To be honest, my stomach is sick with the thoughts of the whole thing. A number of years ago, while I was still married to my late husband, I befriended a guy who was an ace pianist. So if life hands you lemons, don't HIDE them where they could one day trip you up or cause a rotten stink. Yesterday night we went out to drink. It happened two days ago. She may mean it now, but maybe next week she wont, but you cannot rely on it..Is it a pattern of distrust? So if for some reason he'd got funny about it, I'd have just dealt with it. I say tell him. I went out for drinks in town last night and got extremely drunk and kissed another man, it only lasted not even a few seconds but I feel so so so guilty and wish I could take it back. I think it is a better idea for both of you good luck.do share progress. lover. Visit my website and follow me on Twitter @GuyWinch. You reap what you sow. female Whoops. Your punishment is living with this. When you go out and get drunk- if you find yourself attracted to another man- think back to how you feel now after you acted on that attraction. Well as far as my experience with sex,I would definitely say I'm not an expert. I told him straight away what had happened. I guess kissing another when married, with or without the other knowing about it is a sore subject. There is more going on. PS: Don't ever drop it, will you. We are together 12 years altogether and although I had boyfriends before him, it was never serious, and he is the only man I've ever slept with. :-). And what Simone Bienne said on the love line. Being an authentic partner and holding back secrets does not seem to go well together. I think you already knew what you wanted to do, your husband was not home, saw an opportunity, and wanted to use being drunk as a cover story. I made that call today and will move from lates to early starting Monday 16th feb. I wish I told my wife, but she found out because in my browsing history I had searched should I tell my wife I kissed a girl when drunk. Being married is something that can be quite complicated at times. instead of: I felt disorientated. Any advice guys? David bit Jordan. Good luck. Oh, and FYI again: so drunk I didn't know what I was doing tends NOT to be so plugged-in she 5 minutes beforehand notices the sleeping other person needs a blankie and a tucking-in. The straight women in the girls-french kiss-girls video were all shocked at how gentle and 'non-aggressive' female kissers were, in comparison to guys. It was the most thrilling feeling I ever had watching my wife kiss and make out with another guy. female Arun, I agree with everything you said here because I was guilty of kissing a guy I liked when I was drunk, knowing that I liked him and wanted to see how much.". "He's a great kisser" what she said to me. I'm going to keep my distance from my work colleague and I'm going to ensure nothing like this ever happens again. If your boyfriend still trusts you- then his faith in your fidelity moving forward should give you faith in yourself. he said if i started making out with another girl, hed be into it, but if i started getting carried away and disappearing with Hi SoulMate! If you kissed someone while you were drunk then perhaps you are worried about doing it again. reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2006): A Do you want to end you marriage? Do you think it's better to alleviate your guilt by hurting someone you loved or better to just deal with it on your own? I am giving him space to think. If you kissed a stranger while you were drunk, dont worry about it. You're going through tests BY OTHERS to find out why you can't fall pregnant. Then you must be doing it wrong. Keep it to yourself. Even if it is innocent kiss, I am done. I'm not sure how long we were there when one of the women decided to call it a night, and left in a taxi. ;-p We were not drunk. If, on the other hand, you kissed someone whom you knew or someone your significant other believes youve always liked, and then you confess that you kissed him or her, your actions could have major consequences for your relationship Why? A What you *can* have is the Biggest B*lls on the Block award. I feel like I like myself down and my husband down. I'd be obsessed with it. Is kissing someone else when drunk cheating? You have a number of choices in terms of how to deal with what happened. How Psychologically Conditioned Rats Are Defusing Landmines, The Innate Intelligence Observed in the Dying Process. I kissed another guy when drunk but can't remember?! I took the ride. I sent the guy packing with a friendly piss-take (whilst deliberately flashing my ring), and then told hubbie the minute I got home. He left and went to the lake. i agree with everyone there's some really good sharing here. [1] you didn't foresee and avoid being in that predicament. Hang on because I'm sure there will be other people who believe differently from me. What am I going to do? I am the same way. My eyes were closed and my head was spinning. Oh, I'm sure he'd be able to forgive her, LOYAL GIRL. / Houston, turns out I/you/I+You can't have kids the natural way after all, which is no-one's fault; let's try IVF / adopt / foster / console ourselves with the fact we'll always have each other, and the babies of people we know to borrow, and the freedom and greater financial means to please ourselves. A forum community dedicated to married life between you and your spouse. Because I already had some unresolved feelings for this guy and I let him kiss me and used the fact that I was drunk as an excuse. For the last two years have read a lot about infidelity. If you drink so much that you lose track of everything, then you already took the first step on a dangerous road. When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission, which supports our community. Houston, we have a problem. "and even though he said he immediately pulled away" You werent totally bombed out of your mind, so you realized what you did and you felt guilty about it. The moment feelings are involved then youve cheated. You can even introduce is as you 'having something to tell him that you're very proud of yourself over and wholly expect will make him proud of you too'..such as: Well you need to figure that out and fast. (Sorry you got cheated on. So this was the whole tone in which I recounted it to hubby, ergo, he thought it was amusing (the event and my comeback), flattering to him *and* reassuring. That's a lot to take in. Login first We have only been seeing each other for the past two months and I dont want his mind racing with bad thoughts. Even so, you might find that you are still attracted to other people. It's just a "good weekend?" I said to my husband, I have something to tell you, but I dont know how to say it.. essar stanlow address,

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